GOOD Grief!

OK....     I was wrong.  It was STUPID!  What WAS I THINKING? 

 I was feeling a little lonely.  My husband told me on the eve of our 27th wedding anniversary that he had moved someone into my home, kitchen, bed.   He needs Companionship, Romance, Home Cooked Meals.

I thought to my sorry self "you better get busy...  you are a loser, if you don't want to be a lonely mess, sign up for (and PAY) a membership to CHRISTIAN -------.Com   How difficult could it be?"  I could spend the next months and months visiting, meeting, e-mailing... (not face to face, just making friends... what's the harm?)

What a MISTAKE.  Not 24 hours later, I withdraw my membership, give them the money, good riddance... never want to see them again.  

At first,      I saw profiles for out of State 'widowers'.   Fathers, devoted to their children.  The were all so geographically FAR away, I felt safe.     I sent responses to a couple of men in the same age range (half century up).  I saw one who was ' in music ministry' and in the same Valley I come from.  He asked for a Photo (although my profile had one).  The photo on the profile was VERY modest (covered head to toe).  I realized it was possibly not fair, and began to upload more honest, recent photos.  It takes time for the site to go through the photos....   so I thought (STUPID thing for me to THINK) I would let the person in 'music ministry' know I had uploaded photo's, but if he was curious, he could watch my little home movies (not all, or even most, or even more than a minute....   just to see how I appear).
He wrote back ASAP to say,
      "I don't have the 'time or ingenuity' to watch a bunch of home movies....  If your interested in meeting, call me (at the cell # provided).    He was in a hurry.  I wrote one sentence.

                   Thank you, this is more valuable than you could know.

Goodness, gracious.   He wrote back in a hurry.... What?
  "What does that mean, more valuable?     I am more valuable?  Is what I said is more valuable?  I don't want to play games, call me if you want to meet!!!"

I instantly stopped the association with Christian-------.Com  They gave me a chance to change my mind,  said "come back soon....   "  

 I was not interested in a relationship....    I was interested in meeting someone, a Christian...   living anywhere in the WORLD but not Of the WORLD to visit with.  I am SO thankful my swollen eyes were opened sooner than later. 

I am still alone, but not LONELY.   Today, my treasured 'friend' called.  I had been thinking about her... a lot.   It turns out she needed my thoughts and prayers.   I should pay close attention.  Dear Lord....       Please, remind me I am not alone.   Please Stop me from being STUPID. 
Thank you.